Conversation Pieces

This is my conversation peace...

Facebook as many know is an awesome community of folks... some you know, some you don't and all of whom you are getting to know or are getting to know you ("hoping you like me")...I love it because as I once told someone it is a way to be in the conversation despite the miles between me and them (friends, loved ones, peers and colleagues) ...I also happen to love to talk (www.blogtalkradio.com/djdannak) and exchanging comments that become conversations is right up my alley.

Facebook consistently and persistently gives me the chance to put my best face forward. I tweet, but the level of engagement and connection offered by facebook is matchless....well matchless for having rich deep connections and conversations with people whom you've never met or seen and is not in the name of love, lust or dating...

The short conversation I had below with Bay Area friend Jacquinn Scales was a chance to express something that I often try to say to whomever will listen.

At the speed of life however we are all on to the next thing in 24 hours or less...having a medium to record these short exchanges or conversations as they were called before phones and internet allows someone like me to leave little legacies that have meaning beyond the "24 hours or less" ...so I turn to my blog-all things real the shelf life of a blog is 24-72 hours (even it is archived until the internet becomes obsolete, can you imagine what that day will look like or what might be next...at this moment I cannot). I am never that hard to please and 24-72 hours will suffice. All I pray to do is plant seeds that can and will grow...so today I am a gardner.

What appears below is Jacquinn's comment about a "status" I posted. I think Jacquinn was picking on me Sunday evening as he had commented earlier on a previous status...but when I received the thumbs up from him and an innocent bystander, another "Facebook Friend" and fellow Alum from Tuskegee commented later in the day on the conversation I thought...."I believe I will share" and so it is

My status read ....

Danna Lafaye Kiel just got caught up watching TI's Road to Redemption

and Tonya jumped in and then came Jacquinn and me

Tonya Hussein Michelle at 11:33pm March 15

I kind of really like that show.

Jacquinn Scales at 11:47pm March 15 via Facebook Mobile

Do you feel as though its kind of a shame that black influential people have to get into trouble before they seek to help the community? Ti and Road to redemption. Then Lil Kim who got in trouble and all of a sudden while in jail has this passion to want to help foster kids. What are your thought?

I think Jacquinn raises a thoughtful and provocative question...below was my answer

Danna Lafaye Kiel at 12:04am March 16

I believe it is what it is ....Here in America we live in a media influenced society that maintains an investment in a star system...I teach for a living and I used to work in records...large numbers seem to always be influenced by what a a very few do (how they live...what they sing about or rap about or in the case of actors the movies they make) so honestly I think its important that if the spotlighted few find an opportunity to use their powers for good and not evil and the change of heart or the revelation of the true heart is sincere and authentic then let it "do what it do" ...the rest of us are responsible for consistently doing our part (if it is our aim) to push the images and profiles of those who have honorable lives worthy of admiration, adoration and have the charisma to captivate and positively energize those in need of such influence and inspiration

Kelley Woods at 11:32am March 16

Well said Dana...I am loving your vibe on this one...It's a struggle out there...Stay with it!!...One Love

Jacquinn Scales at 1:11am March 16 via Facebook Mobile

Very insightful. I wasn't tryna imply that their efforts were phony or anything. I believe God uses folks for different reasons. Its just I wondered what your thoughts were because so many people say "Its a shame it took TI going to jail in order to serve you" and blah blah blah. Hell in my opinion he's making more of an impact with these kids ... Read More than some of these faith leaders and other so called black leaders. I recall being young once...I was in foster care sixteen years and went straight from that into the juvenile justice system and served for years in the California Youth Authority. A lot of things contributed to that that only a selected few could identify with my pain. TI doin a good job and I see him impacting more and more lives along with other megastars as well. S*** we all know government won't do anything on our behalf much less people like ********* so we need the TI's, david banners, Nas and others.

More seeds before I move onto the next backyard garden....

I believe that in the Obama Nation we currently live in and beyond there is work to be done and with Stimulus money trying to trickle down (4 Billion for Police forces (across the nation) and Gang Warfare Prevention)...those who have the strength, courage and the will should be working harder than ever to turn love into action...Love of God, self and country. When we truly love ourselves we will see, hear and think more clearly. We will believe our own dreams and work until they come true. We will speak the mother tongues of care and compassion. We will also do the work that needs to be from Watts to the Whitehouse to rebuild our nation, our world and her people....(do you hear the violins or the drums (the rim shot) or the 808 or horns (trumpet or sax) playing in the background? ...I do :-)

Between Friends

It is never my intention to let a month go by between posts, but here we are two days shy of a month since my last post (Feb 8th). If you read my December blog Passion v. Profession you know I like a few others have a struggle or two (wink wink sarcasm sarcasm). Profession is currently whoopping Passion's tail.

I work everyday like most folks and though teaching is a more than an honorable profession, I count the days til summer and in the process try not choke somebody's child or slit my own wrists :-). I love math, but what I do everyday is not my passion. Since my return from DC the work has been all consuming. I am at the corner of Tired Ave and Overwhelmed Blvd and one block away from Exasperrated Lane. This is life. Momma said there would be days like this...and there are.

My heart is however warmed when I can purchase necessities for my son (lunch pail, backpack and shoes), lotion and a much needed Ped Egg for my own feet. When a "comfort song" (Prince, D'Angelo, Erykah, The Spinners, Lena Horne or Miles Davis) plays on the radio in my car, I can bring into focus...the work. The eye chart at the end of the hallway reads C for "car note", I for "insurance", F for "food", G for "gas", L for "lotion", R for "Rent"...I believe you know the eye chart I am talking about.

So as I do the everyday work of building the life I live and would like to live, I vigorously pursue MY PASSION, wisdom, patience, humility, integrity, honesty and understanding. As a result I (like most women) am very busy. My son's life is the only life more important than my own. Everything I am is because of him. Everything I do is for him (and his future).

I have so many beloved friends with whom I've been blessed to amble along this very active, organic and passionate journey. I am everyday lifted not only by my relationship with Mother/Father God, but by the friends Mother God has blessed me with. Two different days this week Ali and I broke bread with 2 very close friends, Charlotte Dugan and Jennifer Johnson.

My friend Charlotte describes our friendship as a conversation that began from a random introduction in 1998 that has never ended. We have seen each other through joy, pain, loss and the life changes that come with our brand of motherhood...singlemotherhood. Jennifer and I met through a mutual friend and then renewed our friendship vow shortly after Ali was born and renewed it again after she married and gave birth herself. When together our conversation traverses a landscape of topics that only mothers with command of the "poor short term memory language" can even appreciate.

The day after an incredile Salmon and Coconut Rice dinner prepared at her hands, I had the need to complete a conversation we'd begun about exceling in an area. We were combing over what some educators call, the Essential Question. Our essential question is "what is it that I do?" or... "what is it that I am good at?"

Sidebar

Last week I spoke with someone and we were having too deep and too engaging conversation about life and I expressed the concern that I believe that my Dad worked his whole life performing jobs that adequately and at times inadequately took care of our family. He is now 70+ and never (I don't believe) worked doing something he loved. I concluded our convversation with not only this revelation, but said "that is my fear I don't want that...but it feels like exactly where I am going. I simply don't feel good at what I desire with all my being to do (write and direct films) and it feels like I don't have the time to put in the hard work to become good at it and I am already over 39 :-). I spent time with another filmmaker (Director, editor and writer as well) and while he has freelanced way more in the field and built a strong level of expertise he too is further over 39 than I am and has not attained the tangible level of success that allows him with comfort and at the very least routine to earn more for his family. He however provides and provides consistently based on my every visit to their apartment for birthdays and communion. I am not the only one with some concerns.

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Yesterday evening while sitting in my after school component I wanted to close my conversation with Jenn over our ponderance of our Essential Question, "What is it that I do?" She expressed that she and a friend are starting a business and her concern was "Am I smart enough to do this?" The short answer is ..."of course you are !" the long answer came to me yesterday and I text(ed) her and I want to share with you what was revealed to me...

"I thoroughly enjoyed our time together yesterday and we had so many unfinished conversations, but the only thing I know at 41 (which is a little late, but better late than NEVER) is I just have to believe in me whether it feels crazy or not because whether I am excelling at "it" today or not if I am passionate about being "it" or doing "it" I have to believe with all my might that I am fine and greatness is within whether I can yet see it or not (the bible says Greater is He (or She, the creator) that is in me than "he" (or she) that is in the world)...I just have to believe and so do you...every moment (or incident) that makes us unsure is an opportunity to learn and grow...I know it sounds preachy, but as we head down these roads less travelled or well travelled with the brand new landscape that progress and change have created it gets rather lonely and all we have is ourselves..."

My other blogging friend said to me that maybe my blogs from Passion v. Profession and others that turn inward (maybe too far) were a cry for help...I believe Mother God heard my cry...so the journey continues...

PS: Y'all know Ali will be 7 in April so we know the picture is a little dated... :-)...we have indeed come this far by FAITH !!! (I hope you know the rest of the song...)